


I'm Not Saying It Was Aliens

by Daxolotl



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Aliens, Archaeology, Exploration, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-01-18
Updated: 2015-01-18
Packaged: 2018-03-08 01:52:21
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,139
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3191138
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Daxolotl/pseuds/Daxolotl
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Xenoarchaelogist Roxy Lalonde explores a pyramid buried beneath the surface of a long-abandoned planet and discovers a myth of both Human and Troll society. It's aliens.</p>
<p>A Treat for chthonianCrocuta (lovesthesoundof) for Ladystuck Treats 2014.</p>
            </blockquote>





	I'm Not Saying It Was Aliens

**Author's Note:**

  * For [chthonianCrocuta (lovesthesoundof)](https://archiveofourown.org/users/lovesthesoundof/gifts).



A rope drops to the floor with a noise that can only be described as ‘a spool of rope hitting a floor’. A few seconds later, a human slides down the rope and drops to the floor with a noise that can only be described ‘near absolute fucking silence’ and stows her rifle on her back.

"Check one. Baseplate, this is Rogue. You hear me down here?"

A voice crackles over her comms. "I got you loud and clear, girl! These new signal extenders are fancy."

The explorer nods. "Damn right they are. Lemme know if it starts getting weaker, I’ll throw another one down."

"I could do with some visuals. Help a girl out?"

Xenoarcheologist (a fancy way of saying "I dig up alien shit, figuratively and literally", if you ask her) Roxy Lalonde flicks on the pair of infrared flashlights atop her gas mask. The planet has breathable air, but she never knows what might be in the ruins. Poison, natural gas buildup, alien bacteria; usually dust was the worst of it, but she’s not about to risk catching Super Mega Spaceplague From Mars. The stone tunnels ahead of her light up, at least through the digital lenses of the mask.

"Thanks, babe," Latula says, and Roxy starts walking.

The tunnels lead to something buried beneath the planet’s surface. Mineral scans a few months back had revealed what looked like a sunken city. Roxy quietly thanks the fact that nothing valuable had been detected in or around the place; it wouldn’t be the first site to be completely demolished just to get at a vein of iridium hiding beneath it.

"Okay, looks like you should be rounding a corner and coming up on the main cavern any second now. It should be pretty obvious when you…whoa." Roxy rounds the corner and comes face-to-face with a pyramid. A fucking huge pyramid, buried beneath the surface for untold millennia.

"…Aliens, ‘Tula. Freakin’ aliens."

"I know. We’re pretty damn great."

"Trolls don’t count. I mean…aliens. _Set up all of human evolution and development_ type aliens. This is a pyramid! It’s like the ultimate proof!"

"Okay, you lost me somewhere in there, girl."

"Goddess, didn’t you ever watch the history of the history channel channel? _I’m not saying it was aliens, but, aliens_? We have hundreds of conspiracies back on Earth about this shit. Aliens and gods and angels, coming from the skies to build pyramids and advance human evolution."

"Angels and aliens were always destroyers in our myths. You really had them as guardians?"

"What can I say? Humans are weird."

"That you are. I…damn, we need to stop conspiring and get to it. This could be big, and I for one don’t feel like having a second team show up to steal all of our glory."

"Hell no, the glory’s all ours. We're not losing another one to Megido." Roxy approaches the pyramid, reaching the base. The rock feels harder under her feet than the caverns do. “Looks like the pyramid is built from harder stones than everything around it. They were brought here from somewhere else. Pretty big project.” She climbs the stairs at the front of the structure slowly, making sure to look around as much as possible to give Latula more footage to build her 3D image of the place.

About three quarters of the way up, she stops walking. "There’s a door here."

"A door? In a pyramid? Why the hell would there be a door three quarters of the way up a…well son of a bitch, that’s a door there."

The door is made of the same dark green stone as the rest of the structure, and on the centre of it are the engravings of two serpents, intertwined.

"Should I open it?" Roxy asks, already knowing the answer.

"Do you even need to ask?"

Roxy pulls out her door jack and wedges the corner under the stone. As soon as she does, the door slides open without so much as a groan or a squeak. "…That, I wasn’t expecting. And I suddenly don’t want to go into the creepy pyramid with hissbeast iconography and a power source that still works."

"Wuss!" Latula says, despite the audible waver in her voice. She’s nervous. A power source running after this long is unheard of. Roxy idly checks her Geiger counter, drawing her rifle and stepping into the structure. She flicks out a signal extender and places it down on the ground, just to be certain the signal doesn’t die. It’d be just like an alien race to install jammers in their ancient electrically-powered pyramids like humans do in movie theatres.

"Fuckin' movie theatres. What if I need to make a call, huh?" she's distracting herself with small talk, which Latula seems to understand. Inside the structure, stairs lead downwards, toward the centre. "I guess the only way is down," Roxy mutters, and starts her walk through the long dark of the pyramid.

As she walks, she begins to notice hieroglyphics lining the grey-green walls. Small but plentiful. What had initially seemed like random, rough carvings begin to make sense. Roxy catches glimpses of serpents; of broad-shouldered creatures and of constellations.

She ventures deeper, and the hieroglyphics become clearer. The creatures adorning the walls are more well-defined now, more recognisable. Their form triggers something deep within Roxy’s subconscious.  
"Those things look creepy. Dangerous. I don’t trust ‘em, girl," Latula says, and Roxy all-but jumps out of her skin.

"Fuck! Warn me next time you’re going to do that, would you?" The xenoarchaeologist takes shaky breaths, trying to keep calm and preserve the oxygen of her mask.

"Sorry, Rox."

"I think I might be nearly at the bottom. Or the centre. Or something." Roxy reaches the bottom of the stairs. A corridor stretches out in front of her, with a second door at the end.

"Yeah. From your co-ordinates, I’d say you’re about *&%*~ awa£ fr^@ |$@ %entre."

Roxy taps her earpiece. “Latula, you’re cutting out. Repeat your last?”

Nothing but static reaches her ears, and she’s officially reaching levels best described as _flipping the fuck out_. She doesn’t know what to do. She needs to get out, re-establish contact with Baseplate. Glory can wait, because Roxy chooses life.

The door unseals with a slow hiss of gases being released, and rises into the ceiling. “Oh, hell. Please don’t be facehuggers. I'm no Sigourney Weaver.”

Roxy Lalonde approaches the open doorway with her rifle raised, prepared for just about anything other than facehuggers.

Another thing she isn’t prepared for is a five-foot tall creature with bright green skin, carving hieroglyphs into a stone tablet. It looks up at her with eyes full of joy and youth, and beams.

"Hello, my darling! I’m so glad you finally made it. Would you like a cup of tea?"

**Author's Note:**

> The original prompt from chthonianCrocuta (lovesthesoundof) was:
> 
> "This one is a rework from last year, and another worldbuildy prompt: I'd like to see a sci-fi or fantasy (or indeed science-fantasy) AU in which cherubs are only just being formally discovered by the focal race or races (humans, or humans and trolls, or humans under troll rule - something in this vein, and by all means do include carapacians or others if you'd like). First contact scenarios with a phenomenally powerful creature, myths and legends turning out to be true or partially true, Calliope unexpectedly being a total sweetheart who draws pictures - anything like this will make me happy.
> 
> Couple of possible directions:
> 
> \- your favourite lady is part of the research team making first contact with a young adult cherub they've found, and she's the one the creature chooses to communicate with  
>  \- your favourite lady breaks into a lab to steal some sort of formula or research from The Evil Empire (trolls, maybe?) and upon discovering their living cherub specimen, impulsively decides to break her out as well  
>  \- your favourite ladies are an adventuring duo (or trio!) who stumble upon an ancient tomb in which a powerful creature is interred, and they accidentally wake her up
> 
> As in all my requests these are guidelines only, but no matter what you choose to do please don't include underage stuff and please avoid downer endings. Other than that, Ladystucker, it's up to you!"
> 
> I know it doesn't have a heavy emphasis on Calliope, but I hope you enjoy it regardless.


End file.
